During all police investigations it will be necessary to visit a strip joint at least once.(The villains are always associated with the strip joints and/or run them along with their henchmen)

All beds have special L-shaped top sheets which reach up to armpit level on a woman but only to waist level on the man lying beside her.(The censor board says frontal nudity is okay for males but not okay for females)

It’s easy for anyone to land a plane providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down.(You don’t need a pilot’s training or a license to land a plane if you are the hero ;all that is required is the control tower chap bawling instructions ,with the word OVER at the end of each of the short sentences)

A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.(It is not the pain of the wounds but the healing touch of the girl which causes more more suffering)

Large loft-style apartments in New York City are well within the price range of most people – whether they are employed or not.(The hero is a small-time worker in a factory earning his honest bread but lives in upmarket apartments fitted with the latest gadgets)

Even when driving down a perfectly straight road it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments.( Driving would imply vigorous rotating of the steering wheel)
At least one of a pair of identical twins is born evil.(Whenever there are twins one of them is separated in childhood when they visit a country fair and becomes a hardened criminal later but in Bollywood films he returns to the family after due repentance)

A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.(only suspended cop can solve all crimes but the top brass of the police are usually stupid and don’t understand even the simplest nuance of investigation when the hero explains the strategy)
If you decide to start dancing in the street everyone you bump into will know all the steps.(The whole street is full of people who are only willing to gladly cavort along with the hero)
Should you decide to defuse a bomb don’t worry which wire to cut. You will always choose the right one.(this complicated wiring is child’s play for this guy)

Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communications system of any invading alien society.

Extremely beautiful and intelligent women are likely to become prostitutes or welders.(that is why one should not be pretty and brainy ;otherwise one ends up in brothels)
It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts – your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.

When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your bedroom will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish.

Police departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned to a partner who is their total opposite.

When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.( In Bollywood foreign goons wear red wigs and speak English with a funny Indian accent)

Radiation causes interesting mutations – not to your future children but to you, right there and then.

If you are blonde and pretty, it is possible to become a world expert on nuclear fission at the age of 22.(In Bollywood you have to wear a knee-length skirt and point to algebraic calculations on the blackboard with a stick explaining the science behind the project)

Honest and hard working policemen are traditionally gunned down three days before their retirement.(Their sons grow up to become tough cops and avenge themselves on the murderers)

Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their archenemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gasses, lasers and man eating sharks which will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape.(they do not blow it up immediately ,having spent so much resources on making it all up)
To be a German army general, it is not necessary to speak German, but it IS necessary to speak English with a German accent.

When in a war, don’t show anyone a picture of your girlfriend, or you will be killed shortly, especially if she is beautiful.

If anyone relaxes next to a large window, they are sure to be thrown out of it shortly.(This one is not native to our Bollywood ; so we don’t speak about it)